Love Leigh

Not in my nature.  Not anymore.  I will be there. Every Sunday, whether you like it or not.  I will be there even if it's just to spite you, every Sunday.  Force you to come home from the lake early. Force you to give up plans. Force you to feel uncomfortable in your home, in your skin. Like you do to me.  I will NEVER give up on my relationship with him.  If that means I have to sit there in silence while he plays his Switch. Fine. I will.  If that means I have to be "disrespectful" as he calls it... I call it parenting... then I will.  No more allowing you to get away with murder, no more allowing you to alienate my child.  You have no idea what I am capable of. No idea what I will do. That's what makes this so great.  I always thought I never learned anything from J... but in reality I did.  I learned to be vindictive, passive aggressive, and spiteful.  Guess that's going to come into good use here.  But remember you br...

Three hundred fifty two days.  Impatiently waiting, pacing, thinking, and barely surviving.  You know, when someone suffers from anxiety they tell you about overthinking and about the pain that comes with anxiety. You know? Hard to breathe, pain in your chest that you associate with anxiety (I myself, associate with heartbreak). But they don't mention much about the incredibly painful numbness that comes after that anxiety attack.  Some of you who suffer with anxiety might know what I'm talking about and for that I'm truly sorry for you. It's worse then the pain. It's worse because you welcome the numbness. Nothing is worse than preferring to feel "nothing" over feeling love, loss, happiness, anger.  It's worse because instead of wanting to feel happy, you WANT to feel nothing. "Nothing" is safer. There is no end to "nothing". There is always an end to happiness, to love. So you would rather feel "nothing" knowing that in ...